We run from grief because loss scares us,
yet our hearts reach toward grief
because the broken parts want to mend. – Brene Brown
Healing requires us to live courageously and allow ourselves to fully experience the feelings
of loss and grief. – Brene Brown
There are many valuable lessons we learn as we journey through grief in the many chapters
that make up our life stories. Sometimes that lesson is to learn and foster courage. We
often are taught that courage and strength looks like being silent in our pain, or avoiding
tears… We treat emotional pain as if it is a contagious disease and we must hold it within –
so we do not infect anyone with the emotion. We do this because we believe we are
protecting others by staying strong, when in reality we still are living out the emotion through
anger and/or isolation. Running and hiding from the grief experience can lead to deepened
insecurity, depression, and anxiety. Which feeds into further anger and isolation. In reality,
we need the courage to share our story and emotion with each other. We need connection
through empathy (to feel with another) to heal when we hurt.
Courage and strength is being able to tell your story and show who you are with your whole
heart. When grief is present, it needs to be recognized, then held, so it may heal. I cannot
promise your grief experience will go away completely in your lifetime, but I assure you
there is great healing and comfort through connection. However, you can only heal what
has been processed and fully experienced. Like Brene’s quote, “our hearts reach towards
grief, because the broken parts want to mend.” Even when it’s scary and seems impossible
to heal, you must honor your emotions and where they come from. Allow your heart to heal
the way it truly needs to and only your heart, through empathic connection, can do this.
Grief reveals and teaches you the power of your love, and your resilience. I encourage you
to practice courage this week by connecting and sharing your story. My prayer for you today
is to process and open up to one another, and as you lean into your story and share with
the world your whole self – broken and mended – you find acceptance and peace.
-Miranda Farthing, LPCA
About the Author: Miranda Farthing is a Licensed Professional Counseling Associate (LPCA). She obtained her Bachelor’s in Psychology, her Master’s of Science in Clinical Mental Health Counseling, and Ed.S in Professional School Counseling at Harding University in Searcy, Arkansas. Her internship was with Little Rock Central High School in Little Rock, AR under the supervision of Kim Williams and Emily Taylor. She also interned with the Compassion Clinic at Harding as a Resident Counseling Intern under the supervision of Dr. Gene Wright. Miranda works as a School Based Therapist and Clinician for Emerald.